Organising team building activities in London used to be a game of rounders in Hyde Park with warm beers. That was before you googled “team building activities in London”.

There are often times when you work in an office that everyone apart from you seems to be 1. Annoying. 2. Stupid. 3. Lazy. 4. Completely pointless. This is even more apparent when you get together with people from different departments doing some sort of weird activity that is described as “team building”.

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Even though you probably never will need or want to speak to Dave in accounts ever again, you might actually have a good time if you organise one of these (not totally shit) team building activities.

For massive groups:

Work of Art, venues across London
The idea is to split into smaller groups and each team will have a piece of the picture to paint, not knowing what the bigger picture is. Then everyone will come together at the end and fit it together like a puzzle. This sounds like it could really bond people with the power of art but in reality, it will end up being about that one team who have f****d it up. Which will be fun too.
www.cccevents.co.uk/work-of-art#overview

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Table tennis tournament, your office/Farringdon/Old Street
OK this is pretty lazy research but most people do like table tennis or have to pretend they do in order to not be left out when their friends ALWAYS PLAY IT. Rent loads of table tennis tables, organise a massive tournament and see how competitive your boss is. This is assuming you have a large warehouse office that can fit 10 table tennis tables at one time. Or just hire out the entire downstairs of Bounce.
www.blankcanvasentertainment.co.uk/acts/table-tennis/
www.bouncepingpong.com/

Last Man Standing, Oxford Circus
Get the whole office to this live gameshow pub quiz. Lots of booze always does the trick to make you think you like someone more than you do. And a quiz is a good way not to have to listen to their incessant chitchat.
www.designmynight.com/london/whats-on/party/last-man-standing

Drink Shop Do, Kings Cross
Hire out this venue and you can spend an afternoon and evening eating, drinking, modelling clay, dancing, life drawing. Oh…hang on… making a study of a naked man’s cock with your boss standing next to you… that’s probably on the “list of situations to avoid being in with your boss”.
www.drinkshopdo.co.uk

Situations to avoid being in with your boss…

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Crazy Golf, various venues across London
Obvious but good – you can split into smaller groups, avoid too much awkward chat, involve alcohol from the start and go to some quite cool venues around London.
www.junkyardgolfclub.co.uk/london
swingersldn.com
www.plonkgolf.co.uk

Not massive groups:

Bubble Football, Powerleague, Shoreditch/Wembley/Croydon
Even if football isn’t everyone’s thing, this does look quite fun and because you’re in a bubble it’s obviously fair game to push someone over steal the ball and score a goal. In your head, this is what will happen.
www.eventwise.co.uk/event/bubble-football

Four Thieves Pub, Clapham Junction
A pub that has a remote-control car racing track errrrrrrrrr this might be the best idea ever. Don’t even wait for the team building event. Just stop what you’re doing and go there now.
www.fourthieves.pub/barcade

Archery Fit, Greenwich
A bit more w*nky and not really about a team, actually quite individual. So divide into teams and compete against other departments obviously!! Just don’t be on the team with Dave from accounts.
archeryfit.com

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London Shuffle Club, Shoreditch
Nobody knows how this game is played or won, but that’s why you should go as an office team building activity because then when you go with your mates you will know, and you will have got some good practice in. And you can add cocktail making class to the activities, to break the ice. Ha good one.
www.londonshuffle.com/littleshuffle

Make your own Terrarium, your office/Peckham venue
This is maybe a bit cutesy but something different and who doesn’t want a miniature bottled plant on their desk?
www.jarandfern.co.uk/workshops

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